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DUE
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DALLAS
DAY ONE
HOUR 1
Ah yes, Dallas... of course, the show is starting off with the "Dallas" TV Show theme song
It's pretty hot out, apparently
One woman went into labor waiting in line for the audition, and gave birth to a baby girl.
They're ready to start, but Paula is missing!
Time for the first audition of the day!
1) Jessica Brown
Good girl in High School, bad girl in College. Did drugs and other stuff.
A Carrie Underwood song changed her life. Now, she's back to her sweet self!
Now she wants to be an inspiration to people who may want to screw their lives up.
She has a "safe" voice. Good enough to get her to Hollywood. Kinda plain sounding, though.
Randy: Says "pitchy" for first time!
Paula: ???
Simon: Made song interesting
They left the vote a mystery, but she made it through.
Now, some goofy guy is dancing. (Mistake #1)
2) Paul Stafford
He's a parking attendant. a.k.a. outdoor janitor
He's pretty tall.
Member of Roller Coaster Enthusiasts Club! Nice!
Sings a "former Idol" song (Mistake #2)
Horrible! Horrible! Comically Horrible!
Listened to his family. (Mistake #3)
Yes, love is deaf!
They enjoyed "him", but not his singing. Joyful audition, they all say!
R: No
P: No
S: No
They all say he is a nice guy. Nice guys finish last, though. That sucks. I'm a nice guy, too! ;p
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3) Beth Maddocks
Was a singing waitress at a fondue shop
Kinda slurring words together... can't understand her at all!
Simon agrees with me.
R: No
P: No
S: No
Now, the montage of bad singers.
4) Esteban Deanda - Simon says atrocious
5) Victoria Metz - Awful
6) Drucilla Wideman - Simon just gives a no
7) Alaina Whitaker
A Carrie Underwood look-a-like
Actually a really good singer! And pretty cute, to boot!
Nice strong country voice. I'd buy her record. Or illegally download it at the least! ;)
Simon thinks she's good, but not that good.
R: Yes
P: Yes
S: Yes
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Another bad montage
8) Gregory and Mia Tobias - Duet that is out of sync, tune, and everything sane.
Judges are speechless.
Simon just nods his head, and they understand and walk out.
9) Bruce Dickson
Never kissed a girl, or been intimate.
Wears a key around his neck, and his dad is holding on to the heart, that will be given to his wife when they get married.
Safe voice. Maybe good enough to get through. Not bad.
Simon don't think it will translate well to radio or TV
R: No
P: No
S: No
Girls rush to him after the audition
10) Pia Easley
Hey! Punk Fantasia!
Not sure about the voice. The judges may end up liking it, but it's not my bag of chips.
Bluesy I guess.
Simon says she's interesting, confident, and stylish.
R: Yes
P: Yes
S: Yes
Of course, the Fantasia look-a-like would get through. I'm not impressed.
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11) Brandon Green
Has a collection of his fingernail clippings from since he's been in 7th grade.
Ryan is sick and scared. Don't blame him!
He wants to be an American Idol, but not like Britney or Paris.
Simon asks him if he will avoid stepping out of cars with lack of underwear
He's actually a really good singer! Kinda raspy voice in places, but very upbeat.
Simon says forgettable
Randy likes the tone of his voice, although a bit nasally
Brandon says Simon never lies. Suckup.
R: Yes
P: Yes
S: No
Following a few bad fingernail puns, we're moving on.
12) Kayla Hatfield
Was in a car accident, but survived.
Partial face disfiguration
Strong raspy showtune voice
Not sure if she's right for the show
Kinda screaming
Simon wants to be her for one hour... maybe two... likes her, because she's so happy
R: Yes, after Simon begged him to let her through
P: No
S: Yes, because she's partially mad, like a rocker! :)
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Here we go... more bad singers in a montage. They've actually been keeping a majority of the bad ones limited on screentime! Maybe they're sick of the weirdos getting all of the glory.
13) Erick Mauldin
Ruben Studdard wannabe... can't sing, though
Simon said he sounds like he's 7
14) Charles Markham
Simon: Atrocious
15) Tristan Clements
Seems cocky
Simon says creepy
16) Kady Malloy
Does vocal impressions
She's pretty good... soft and controlled...
Seems to be trying to sing like the singers of the song she's singing
Stopped twice by judges to try to get her to sing like herself
Randy says he likes her "own" voice better than her "other" voices
R: Yes
P: Yes
S: Yes - Says she is the best so far this year
11 people total through on Day One
DAY TWO
HOUR TWO
17) Douglas Stevenson
Doing warmups... weird
Ok, the warmups didn't help... he's really pushing the sounds out.
Ugh... he sure was "Living on a Prayer"!
Ok, he's taking a drink of water, and taking a second chance.
Now he's nervous... the water didn't help.
Simon has had enough.
He just won't stop singing! He whispers something, then belts out offkey notes.
Simon is relentless with trying to get this guy offstage!
And he just keeps going!
Simon just said get out.
Security is called in.
Simon says they're taking him to a safe place.
18) Angela Riley
Her husband is a professional model.
He helped her pick out her songs.
She is quite peppy! Very showtune-ish.
Her husband loves it!
Not sure Simon does, though.
Simon says love is deaf.
They ask "Chad" for her second song.
She is still peppy! I keep thinking "High School Musical"
Simon said she's amateurish.
R: No
P: No
S: No
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Next guy is dressed like a politician, and is pretty much doing a political speech to campaign for AI!
Wants to be governor of Oklahoma!
He is really happy.
19) Kyle Ensley
He's actually not too bad! Fairly on key, but still kinda weird.
He's singing a Queen song! Somebody To Love
Simon is surprised.
R: No - Says "Glee Club", and academic
P: Yes, after much thinking
S: Yes - He was surprised.
That was the shock of the evening! Do we have the next Clay Aiken in our midst? Probably not.
20) Tammy Tuzinski
She is really... dull...
No energy at all... Just, not excited to be here, or something!
Did she even want to come here?
She said one song, sang another.
Completely spaced out.
Her singing is not quite as dull as her energy... but she is bad... Off-pitch big time!
Oh, this is bad.
She thinks the judges will say no. She's correct!
R: No
P: No
S: No
Ryan says she looks like she's in shock. She actually looks the same.
21) Colton Swon
He is in a band with his brother.
Singing "Boondocks"... good cartoon, btw! Song not the same as the show, though.
He has a nice rocker's voice. Pretty good.
Paula says he needs to open his eyes more.
Simon is mixed.
R: Yes
P: Yes
S: Yes
The judges played a trick on his family...
He put the ticket in his pocket, and as he walked out, all the judges were yelling that he was terrible. :)
The trick fooled even Ryan.
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Ok, they're showing a "loser" montage, including six transvestites... No names given, so not numbering them.
Next, a country boy!
He's a farmer... thick country accent.
Sings in his tractor to keep him sane.
Looks like a country version of Blake Lewis.
22) Drew Poppelpeiter
Good country voice! Heavy country accent
R: Yes
P: Yes - Said there was no "Wow" factor, but likes him anyway.
S: No - Doesn't like country
23) Kyle Reinneck
Says he is hardcore rocker... looks more like a preppy trying to be goth.
He is a kids counselor... poor kids.
He's wearing eye-liner, and spray-on tan.
He is really creepy.
His singing is monotonous... barely changing notes
Simon says disturbing and demonic.
R: No
P: No - She says it was scary
S: No
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Now they're doing a Kelly Clarkson montage, using bad singers... oh please, make it stop!
24) Nina Shaw
She's from the same town as Kelly Clarkson.
Now the judges are arguing about how good Kelly was in her audition
Kinda mixed...
Simon thinks old-fashioned and cabaret.
Second song was better.
Randy likes her after the second "jazz" song.
R: Yes
P: Yes
S: No
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PIMP TIME!!!!!
Asian pimp, with silver cape, feathered cap and white, feathery coat.
He has a nice thick accent.
Bowing to Ryan
Simon's name is on his hat.
His hat reminds me of Kid Icarus... not only is it a feather cap, it has wings.
25) Renaldo Lapuz
Sorry, my bad. He's Mexican. Looked Asian, but I guess I was wrong!
He started off not bad, and now he is just bad.
The judges like just having him keep going! Good television!
Randy is swaying, and Paula is doing interpretive dance.
Simon doesn't seem amused, even though everybody is huddled around Simon.
Now, everybody is singing along, even Simon!
Randy is now dancing with pimp.
Now, they drag Ryan in!
Ryan and Randy are having a moment now.
Big group sing-along!
Simon is losing it now, while Paula is doing sign language and dancing!
Simon thinks the song he sang... "We're Brothers Forever", is going to be a hit.
Simon says no, but they didn't show what everybody else voted, but apparently, he didn't make it through.
Ok, once that audition is available on YouTube, I'm posting it! That was the best audition yet this season!
24 total through from Dallas
Next up, San Diego
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